From Egoistic to Altruistic

The man or woman who makes themselves small on account of celebrating others first truly bears the image of the man from heaven.

Jesus is a King who rules over other kings, and yet, He suffered humiliation on behalf of us all. Emptying Himself of His glory to allow us to enter into His rest.

We need to be faithful in the small things if we are to be entrusted with greater things.

I’m not writing that to say that you shouldn’t be proud of your accomplishments, but to keep a heart of supporting others in their lives and dreams at the forefront of what it means to love your neighbor as yourself.

In the Hebraic mindset, the stubborn pride known as ga’avah is not to be commended in oneself.

This word is related to an inflated sense of something, or a massive swelling of the ego.

There is nothing wrong with having some form of positive pride, but our egos should be diminished enough to be a small part of ourselves.

The blessed saints of ages past knew both sides of this delicate issue, choosing to place God on the throne and themselves at His feet.

King David’s psalms offer us a window into what a heart truly surrendered to God looks like.

Psalm 119 moves me with its wisdom on how we are to feel about Yahweh’s perfect instructions. Walk among the lowly without a haughty spirit and don’t esteem the affluent on account of it. Treat all people as worthy of love and dignity.

I can’t say I identify with the so-called “Hebrew Roots” movement anymore, but Torah is the foundation of all that I do, using the yoke of the Messiah’s interpretive framework.

Someone wants your shirt? Give him your cloak as well.

The principle here is always to go further than you thought you ought to.

To use a writing example, if the Lord Jesus were to see a novel you’ve written (He sees all things, but I’m making a point here), would you turn in the first draft or the sixtieth?

If we keep Him on the throne, seeking to glorify Him instead of ourselves, we lessen the ego positively.

Our ego might say, “This is fine the way it is. I’m awesome.” But you wouldn’t give a king fool’s gold. You’d give him the real thing.

We should love others with effort and careful intention as well, leaving our egos in check and wanting genuinely the best for someone else.

Intention means we are serious about something we are getting involved with in multiple facets of our lives.

To use a dating example, I believe in old-school courtship and marriage intention from the start rather than fast-food-style dating. Which is essentially the same thing, minus the “shopping” aspect of the equation. I understand things become serious over time, but it helps to have that firm intention. As Christians, we’re to look for bashert (soulmate), not something that’s not meant for us. Looking for something not meant for us is robbing that person of their intended match in a way, and this is not the way of one who walks with the one who rides the clouds.

With the caveat that if something becomes bashert (destiny) over some time, then maybe it was fated all along.

Notice how I used the word bashert twice with different intended meanings? That’s intention at work. The meaning fit based on what I needed to get across. Otherwise, the phrasing wouldn’t make sense in its proper context.

Sticking to the subject, there’s a permanence there that is intended in finding the right woman for you (I’m a man, so this is from my perspective as one.) Someone who fits your lifestyle like a perfect puzzle piece crafted from the board of the divine and has genuine humility, rather than egoistic and self-seeking people.

The same thing goes for friendships. If we have someone else’s well-being and fulfillment in mind, we are diminishing our egos for the benefit of another human being.

God did not create us to self-gratify at all times. That’s not how He works as a loving Father.

Therefore, I am careful and selective about who I let into my circle. Sometimes, I feel people are only trying to get closer to use instead of care. True benevolence is something I’m on the lookout for, and when someone embodies the qualities I see in Jesus Christ, it is easier to let them in.

I understand we are all works in progress and don’t always live up to that perfect measuring stick that is Jesus Christ.

Working on diminishing our ego can be hard sometimes.

I’ve seen people stuck holding on to the past who can’t forgive what someone did 20 years ago. If you let the ego burn as a candle instead of the sun, you’ll forgive and move on, understanding that Yahweh is the same way. We are to emulate this trait.

Look at Jacob and Esau. They ended up making amends after multiple decades (even though Jacob stole the birthright) and worked things out.

Be intentional about others’ feelings and needs.

But for the love of God, don’t be a doormat. Have the wisdom to know the difference. The ego should be diminished, but not 100% removed.

We should walk without drawing attention to ourselves, as Micah 6:8 says.

Also:

“Toward the scorners He is scornful, but to the humble He gives favor” (Proverbs 3:34 [ESV]).

The LORD is not interested in a large ego, but in understanding the Greek words ego eimi. He exists, and therefore the glory is due Him, not ourselves.

Again, be proud of your accomplishments, but remember each breath you draw, the sight you see with, the ears you listen with, and the acumen you might have, all come from Him.

“But when you are invited, go and sit in the lowest place, so that when your host comes he may say to you, ‘Friend, move up higher.’ Then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at table with you” (Luke 14:10 [ESV]).

It is God alone who promotes and exalts us. We are to love others more than ourselves, and if influence comes, give all credit to Him who holds your breath in His hands.

Blessings and shalom!